Sani people enjoy free love. In ancient times, boys and girls would no longer live at home at the age of 14 or 15. They would ask some close friends with the same gender and find a free house to live in. Such a place for boys was called "public house for male", and the place for girls live was called "public house for female”. The bedding and appliances used in the public house were collected by the people who lived inside. There were no regulated numbers of the people living inside, and generally public houses for female had more people.

The members of public houses are usually neighbors and peers with the same ancestors, so it was convenient when they dated as the invited person of the opposite sex could not have blood ties with a member of the house owners.

Public house was an important place for Sani youth to date. When night fell, all boys entered “public houses for female” for entertainment, singing love songs, having Dasanxian or Xiaosanxian Dance, playing musical instruments, and interacting with girls to establish a relationship with each other through a variety of contacts. With a certain emotional foundation, boys could also invite girls to play at their place.

Boy villagers were free to go to every "public house for female" in the village to entertain. However, if a boy from the outside, if not contacting the local boy with the same destination first, would often be attacked when going to the "public house for female". On the contrary, a boy who had contact a local boy first or an invited “distinguished guest” would be warmly received by the other party, and the best girl in the village might be introduced to him for an unforgettable night.

The seed of love blossomed. After the boy and girl privately agreed on marriage, the boy would tell his father, who would then tell the mother and other relatives and friends. A boy telling his mother or sister about his marriage directly was prohibited.

If the family agreed with the boy’s choice, they would hire a matchmaker to go to the girl’s family for proposal. The hired matchmaker was generally a conversable middle-aged or elderly person who got on well with other people. It was good to choose a person who had good relations with the girl's family so that communication with her family would be easy.

The matchmaker usually went to propose in the evening. For the first time, they only communicated about friendship without any purpose (i.e. not about proposal). Proposal started at the second visit, and matchmaker began to introduce the advantages and disadvantages of the boy's family, mainly the advantages of the boy, expecting the girl’s family to accept him. During the third visit, matchmaker should bring a bottle of liquor, continue the introduction of the boy's situation, and then leave the liquor for a few days. And during the fourth visit, there was no need for both sides to talk much more. All the harsh words would be expressed by the liquor bottle. When the matchmaker left, if the girl’s family asked matchmaker to take the bottle, then the proposal would be refused; on the contrary, it would be accepted. The rest was to visit next time to determine the date and scale of wedding ceremony.

The wedding ceremony of Sani people was called "drinking”. In the old days, people needed to drink twice in marriage process.

The first time, called "minor drinking", was at the engagement ceremony. If the matchmaker succeeded in proposal, then a "minor drinking” would be served. Participants included the girl’s uncles and other close relatives. The banquet was organized by the matchmaker and the brothers of the boy, who would not participate at this time. The "minor drinking” ceremony was held in the evening.

The formal wedding ceremony was called "major drinking", often held on a chosen “luck day” during slack season in winter and spring. A wedding banquet should serve two meals, namely dinner on the first day and breakfast on the second day. The boy's family should take all the responsibility for food.

People from the boy's family preparing the wedding ceremony included matchmaker, bridegroom and his brothers and friends. The team formed by these people must be in pairs. The food for wedding reception should be picked up by the boy’s family. When they arriving at the girl's house, girls closed the door tightly and would not open it until singing in antiphonal style for some time. However long the “rejection” took, the burdens on the men outside should never fall.

When the bridegroom and his fellows entered the house, girls plastered the prepared soot on the boys’ face. Despite efforts to resist, the boys were soon plastered as they carried heavy things. With black face, boys were cheerfully busy preparing dishes for the wedding reception. After the banquet was over in the evening, guests waited for the antiphonal singing contest between singers from the boy and the girl's families. These singers were not average ones, usually the antiphonal singing contest lasted all night without distinguishing the winner.

The wedding reception in the next morning was organized by the girl's family, and the bridegroom and his men became guests, sitting and waiting for the girls from the women's house to serve. At this time, the boys sought opportunities for revenge of the black face yesterday. Their "revenge" wish was fulfilled, but the girls had the "home" advantage and organized more effective "revenge" so that boys might take no advantages at all. Perhaps another seed for romantic love would be planted in such repeated playfulness.

After the lunch, some girls with the bride’s family form a team to accompany the bride to return to the groom’s house together with his families participating in arranging for the wedding ceremony. Then the wedding ceremony was over.